In the traditional sense, husband, biological children? Maybe. But my definitions of family have always been a little unconventional. Also, I’ve become increasingly interested in doing humanitarian work, especially in war-torn parts of the world, and in places that few want or dare to go, and unless I married a man who was perhaps doing similar work, I’m not sure how he would feel about me being gone for most the year and in situations in which my life could easily be snuffed out, it an instant. And especially when it comes to having any children, I don’t think it would be fair for me to have children and then leave them behind, with them never really knowing if I’ll come home, and yet, I wouldn’t bring them with me either, as no child should have to be exposed to war and violence. If I were doing work like the above mentioned and wanted to continue, I just think it would be selfish of me to have children, I’m certainly not one of those people who believes my genes are so superb, I should reproduce as some “favor” to society.
In the end, I think I’d be okay with making the world my family, in a way, in caring for people, especially children, who may not have anyone else. I feel like I’ve already started this a little, in sponsoring children. I have not experienced this yet, so far, but I know many sponsors whose sponsored children think of them like parents (and address them as “mother” or “father”) or something similar. For some of these children, a sponsor is the first person they’ve had encouraging them, nurturing them, giving them guidance, and showering them with love. (Of course plenty of people waste this opportunity, and never write their sponsored children, grossly underestimating just how much the letters really mean to them). There’s really no excuses not to begin with these things now…
Anyway, in a nut shell, I’m not really one who’s ever dreamed about fairytale weddings and having babies, and maybe I’ll change, but for now I wonder if I wouldn’t be perfectly alright with sacrificing having a marriage and kids to do something else I feel is equally, if not more, important (and by that, I mean for me, no judgement on those who desire something different).
I live in Baltimore, Maryland, and I’ll (hopefully) be signing the lease on a new place here in the next few weeks, and move right after the new year. The place has been promised to me, but the landlord is still processing some things, so assuming there’s no hitches, should be mine. It’s an apartment in a late 1800s row home in one of my favorite neighborhoods (the Victorian architecture is to die for), a little bohemia, with many aspiring artists there. It’ll just be me, which is good because I like having my own space, but may eventually consider a roommate down the road if needed, that is if I really want to be splitting bills again to save money.
I’ve been asked this many times, so if you don’t mind, please refer to here.
I am full of love for many people and things, but as far as romantic love, I’m not in a relationship at the moment. I’ve never been one of those people desperate for love, I don’t need a man to define who I am, I’ve been bred of a fiercely independent nature, but that’s not to say if I fell in love I would rebel against it. If it happens, it happens, if it doesn’t, it doesn’t. It is my belief, that being in a relationship be a gift, but so can being single, it’s best to make the most of one’s situation, and there are positives and negatives to almost every walk of life. I mean right now, I love not having to consult anyone else when it comes to making decisions, I could just take off on a jet plane one day, if I wanted, and I wouldn’t leave anyone brokenhearted if I did so (and actually, I’ve done this before). That “throw caution to the wind” kind of freedom can be a very beautiful thing.
I thought I had a list in my FAQ, but just looked and apparently not. Here’s the countries I’ve traveled around, so far: the U.S.A. (obviously), Portugal, Spain, Morocco, India, Nepal, Thailand, Laos, and Vietnam. I don’t know if you wanted a list more specific than that (such as cities), or…?
Her: Or that's common sense trying to come through...
I’m fine, I’m just one of the millions who suffers from this.
Thank you, that’s very sweet of you to say! I’m always a little surprised, albeit flattered, I’m really just an amateur who takes snapshots, although I kind of wish I had the drive to take photography more seriously.
You are not a failure if you don’t peak at the age of fifteen. Look around you, at what you’re doing, because whatever it is, there’s someone younger who’s doing it to greater success, that’s life. It does not matter how many candles are on your birthday cake, dreams don’t have an age, you are no more a failure if you achieve success at the age of eighty-eighty, than at eighteen, so keep going.
You are not a failure if your life does not unfurl gloriously like fireworks, all awe and wonder. Perfection is a charade, an illusion that deflects your gaze. Many will cultivate their lives and show you only the pretty bits, but no one is immune from pain, from heartache, rejection, disappointment, loss. Underneath the skin, we are raw, every one of us, and I want you to remember that.
You are not a failure for not looking like the digitally enhanced human beings you see in magazines, for being flesh and blood and bones. You are not less of a woman if you’re not a size 0, and you’re are not less of a woman if you are a size 0. You are neither a failure for the presence of curves, or wrinkles, or love handles, or for the absence of them. You are more than what can be seen in a mirror.
You are not a failure, if you are not materially wealthy, if you do not have the latest phone, clothes, car, or any sum of inanimate things. Better to be rich in spirit: patience, faith, love, and generosity, cannot be bought, or taken away, eroded by the ocean, or scorched by the sun. They are what give life meaning; the light, where there is darkness.
The closest we come to failing is in giving up, or in never trying at all. You have to be willing to weather the droughts, the deserts, the storms, the struggles, and they may crack your facade and leave their scars upon you, but so long as you do not relent, lay down, and die, you cannot fail. Success is not the same for each individual, we will not all follow the same paths to get there, or arrive at the same time, but to keep moving in the direction of where you want to be, despite hardships and cynics, is what makes you a winner.